Hanukkah at Nearly 30
by Eleza Kort

This year the email came early, maybe around mid September. My close friend from San Francisco was planning her trip home for the holidays and wanted to know “When is the Hanukkah Party?”

The Hanukkah Party, as it is referred to, is the big party my parents throw every Hanukkah. It is the social event of the year, or at least that is how we--my parents, sister and myself--and our 40-50 closest friends see it. My parents have been throwing it for many years now and although the people in attendance change depending on who is living near by (currently that is me, a while ago it was my sister but she now lives further away) it is always a big family affair that we all try to make it to every year.

At the party, my father cooks latkes in the kitchen; my mother and I run around like social butterflies; people of all ages attend to eat the food and shmooze. Various groups of people mingle. Some have been coming to the party for over a decade like my friends from high school and my parents' closest friends, while others are newer party goers such as neighbors, friends from the workplace, and any other lucky Jewish people who happened to make my mother's acquaintance in time to be invited. For many of these people this is the one time of year they see each other and it is their chance to catch up over potato pancakes and apple sauce.

At one point during the party we all gather in the living room around the mantle my mother has carefully decorated with dreidels and chocolate gelt, to light the menorahs. My father takes out his guitar, my sister and I each light one menorah, and the entire room sings the prayers together followed by “Mao Tzur” and “Sevivon Sof Sof.” Sometimes someone hops over to the piano and we attempt to elaborate on our Hanukkah song repertoire. Then my mother makes a poignant speech about family, friends, and how this festival of lights has brought us all together. It is all quite wonderful.

What makes The Hanukkah party so special is the excitement everyone brings to it. In this day and age, you might not think that a child, a teenager, a person in their late twenties, a middle-aged person, and an elder person could all attend the same function and have an amazing time, but they do! My parents create an environment filled with warmth and an honest appreciation of not only celebrating Hanukkah, but celebrating the fact that we are all together again. Not to mention, of course, that my father truly makes the best latkes around!

Even before my family began hosting The Hanukkah Party, Hanukkah was exciting for me and meant lighting candles, singing songs, and opening small, fun gifts. As a child, it upset me that my father would not let us have a Christmas tree (I asked), and that my Christian friends got huge elaborate gifts at Christmas time, while I got videos, calendars and socks. But now, as an adult, I am so grateful, because for me, Hanukkah has very little to do with gifts. It is about spending time with family.

I am almost thirty, but I guarantee you that my mother has bought me a calendar, a dreidel filled with chocolate gelt, and some cute socks. She has wrapped them in paper covered with menorahs and placed them under her mantel. And when I go over there to light the candles next week a few days before The Party, my father will take out his guitar to sing songs as I open the gifts. It is one of our family traditions, and I love it.

Hanukkah brings people together in my life, and for that I am grateful. Whether it is a small affair with just my parents and sister or The Party with 40-50 of our Jewish and non- Jewish friends, I always look forward to this time of year when we can gather to light candles, share good food and company, and sing songs together about dreidels spinning and the festival of lights.

Eleza Kort is an actress and teaches theater in the Boston Area. She has an MA in Theater Education from NYU and specializes in creating original theater with young people in order to dialogue about social issues. She has taught and directed children of all ages from preschool to high school and in various locations such as New York City; Laconia, New Hampshire; and Cambridge, Newton, Sharon, and Milton, Massachusetts. She currently lives in Brookline and enjoys the opportunity to write articles about the role Judaism plays in her life.